HERE FOR THE BIER

performed at Cumbernauld Town Hall, February 1975

FRED DOYLE	Pat Lewsley	WALLY	Jim Haldane
ADAM ARMSTRONG	Ron Paterson	SAMUEL ARMSTRONG	Brian Gillespie
ALEC ARMSTRONG	Jim Clark	WILLIAM ARMSTRONG	Charles McKinnon
AGGIE MUNRO	Betty Naismith	LIZ CRUICKSHANK	Rena Haldane
CLEMENTINE	Margaret McKinnon	DORIS	Hilda Gibson
JESSIE DUNN	Beth Ferguson	MARY DEWAR	Pat Currie
SIR RANDOLPH CLEWS	Jim Morrison	CEDRIC MARLOW	William Samson
MAGGIE ARMSTRONG	Ena Simons	CHARLIE PERRY	Billy Young
FLORA GIBBONS	Liz Scott

Cumbernauld's Apex Players retained their reputation for providing first-class entertainment with their presentation of "Here for the Bier" in the Town Hall this week.

This comedy, written and produced by a member of the club - Joe Simons - was thoroughly enjoyed by an audience of almost 200 senior citizens on Monday evening, although I suspect that the older folk did not catch all the laugh lines. Joe must have been very pleased at the reaction to his play and tickled pink by the portrayal of some of the characters he created.

"Here for the Bier" is the story of Glasgow building contractor Adam Armstrong, his family and friends - 17 characters in all - and the action takes place in a typical Glasgow pub - "The Laughing Dolphin", managed by an Irishman.

Adam's sons have not quite come up to their father's expectations but the wily old fellow sorts this out when his will is read after his death - leaving the boys, their wives, and Fred, the publican and Wally, the so-called personal assistant, certain conditions to fulfil before they can inherit their legacies. The set - "The Laughing Dolphin" - was excellent in every way - the large glass window being especially cleverly constructed. The drinks consumed were so realistic that is not difficult to accept the inebriated condition of some of the characters. The coffin used in the second act was very effective - we were sure that Adam was lying peacefully in it. Yes, full marks for the set and props.

Mr Simons wrote the characters of the play around the members of the Apex club and, in some cases, I felt that the players needed more challenge in their parts. With 17 characters there was the obvious danger of "masking" but this did not materialise except in a few isolated instances.

The comedy produced some beautiful performances, and none more so than Wally (Jim Haldane). Looking like Dick Emery's "bovver boy" and with a "Josie" (of "Francie and Josie") accent, Wally was a tremendous character. Played to perfection, his every remark and reaction brought response from the audience. Jim had obviously worked hard at his part and deserved his biggest success.

Wally's public enemy No. 1, publican Fred Doyle (Pat Lewsley) was another part full of funny lines. Pat, well-known in the town for his many fine performances, again made the most of a good part. I felt Pat especially excellent in his reaction to the various conversations going on in his pub and he brought absolute authenticity to the "behind the bar" activities - washing glasses, etc.

Another weel-kent face, Ron Paterson was Adam, the father. Ron always produces the goods in his characterisations, and Monday night was not exception. His portrayal of the wily old businessman was just right. He had some excellent laugh lines, as when he says to the buxom Aggie Munro, "There's a couple of things about you that remind me of Marilyn."

Adam's three sons, William, Samuel and Alec were played by Charles McKinnon, Brian Gillespie and Jim Clark. Charles is a very funny man on stage, and is unsurpassed as a fellow with too much to drink. William, the normally sober one who is persuaded to drink a bit more than usual, was tailor-made for Charles, and he didn't miss the opportunity of getting laughs galore. Charles would have made a wonderful "silent movie" actor, so good are his actions and expressions.

Brian, as Samuel, did very well as the son home from London with the "seven year scratch" (I mean itch!) In his best performance yet, he too had some great lines and I like his retort when Flora accused him of formerly enticing her up dark closes: "I just wanted us to be close friends."

Jim Clark, as the younger son Alec, had a smaller part, but he too played it competently.

William's wife, the watchdog Clementine (Margaret McKinnon), and Samuel's better half, the devoted Doris (Hilda Gibson) were played by two very experienced actresses giving the parts exactly what they required. Alec's girlfriends, the sporty Aggie Munro (Betty Naismith) and the intellectual Liz Cruickshank (Rena Haldane) contrasted perfectly in dress and expression, and the glamour of the play was supplied in the form of Flora Gibbons (Liz Scott). Liz is an attractive person and a competent performer, but I should like to have seen here in a long, flowing wig and a diaphenous blouse to make her look even more sexy.

Special mention must be made of two new members of the Apex Players - Beth Ferguson, who played the neighbour Jessie Dunn, and William Samson, who was Sir Randolph Clewes' Personal Assistant. Beth was most impressive - her previous experience with the Bonnybridge Players coming through quite clearly. William, whose stage debut this was, caught the character very well - his dress and accent was a PA to a tee.

Adam's wife Maggie (Ena Simons) and the singing undertaker Charlie Perry (Billy Young) also added to the enjoyment and efficiency of the play. The ever-enthusiastic Jim Morrison as Sir Randolph did has part well, even though the big cigar was missing on Monday evening.

Last, but not least, was the performance of Pat Currie as Mary Dewar, the pregnant girl. Pat almost stole the show with her immaculate portrayal of a lady "in the pudding club". Her appearance - and especially her waddle - were superb. Well done, Pat.

My thanks go to Joe Simons and the Apex Players for an enjoyable evening - and congratulations on this the world premier of "Here for the Bier".